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So let’s discuss, is flirting cheating?

This week I’ve found myself thinking about a question that’s important to understand your own answer of if you’re dating and after chucking it in the direction of various people I know, I’ll now allow anyone else to answer it for themselves.

Is flirting with other people while you’re in a relationship considered as cheating?

I think the most important thing that needs to be considered here is this – what is the intent behind the flirt, because here’s my theory that I know won’t be received well but I’ll say it anyway. I don’t believe men can flirt without there being sexual intent behind it, whereas I believe women can.

For a man to initiate flirting with a woman, there will be some kind of sexual desire there. So really when a guy flirts, the idea of that flirting to be taken further wouldn’t ever be off the table.

However for women, sometimes we flirt purely because we want to feel desired or wanted by someone and we don’t even have to find that person attractive, but it’s more of an ego boost. We can flirt to get a drink, or to get something done for us. But …. it’s actually quite rare that we do this with a sexual intent.

But does that make it any less worse? That bit I’m not sure about.

So is flirting cheating? I think it depends on the intent behind it. Because if you’re only doing it because there’s some kind of sexual desire for the person you’re flirting with then I would have to say yes, because realistically and if we’re going to be honest, it probably means if you could sleep with them you would (but hopefully your moral compass would kick in first).

All that to one side though, I think even those of us in the most secure relationships probably have our stomachs turn at the thought of our other halves flirting with people who aren’t us. So wether you consider it cheating or not, it probably isn’t morally on track, but it’s definitely a conversation the two of you should have together to make your boundaries clear and to save any feelings getting hurt in the future.

One thing I can be sure of is that flirting with other people is probably quite a big trust violation and why would you risk doing something that could break your partners trust?

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Do you want to know?

When you look at me is it because you want to know what it feels like to kiss me?

Do you want to know what it feels like to put your hand on my waist as you pull me in closer to you? Do you want to know if you’d be able to make my heart race faster just be breaking all of the rules of ‘space’ we have to have between us.

Do you every try to remember how my skin feels against your lips as you kiss my neck, maybe you could still smell my perfume, or maybe you were too drunk to even notice?

Do you want to find out what it feels like to kiss me before you disappear for good?

Do you want to know what I think? Because I’m thinking about you and how I think you’d kiss me with a sense of urgency, I think it would be like that because you’d have lost the control you’ve been trying so hard to have over not wanting me anymore.

Repressed desire always has a way of sneaking out in the end, but maybe since we only have one opportunity to let it run away with us that makes it ok?

Do you want to lose control for one evening and let yourself think about me? Even though I know how hard you’ve been trying not to.

Would kissing me ruin it for you? This fake sense of control you’ve given yourself.

This evening could be ours, no one else would have to know. Maybe we can let these last few hours wash over us as if no one else was here, because if no one else was here what would you want to do?

Do you still want to know what it would feel like to have me in whatever way you desired most? It’s ok, she doesn’t have to know.

We won’t have to see each other again after tonight so maybe you want to find out what it’s like to kiss me and I mean really kiss me, do you want to know what I think should happen? I think you should lead me away from everyone else and lean in slightly too close to me, just to find out what would happen next.

If you still want to know what it’s like to kiss me, then you should do it on your final few hours when we won’t have to see each other again afterwards, that way looking at me the next day won’t remind you that you have to feel guilty.

So do you want to know what I think? I think you should do it while you still have the chance.

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Sexting 101

texting-games-to-play-with-a-guy

Sexting is a funny thing, some of us are great at it and some of us cringe just thinking about doing it, the best part is, you can sext your fella while you’re going about your daily tasks as if it we’re nothing, but for the guy reading it … well his mood will have suddenly changed completely.

Thats the difference between us girls and the guys. They will get right into this kind of thing and really, lets be honest the only reason we normally sext them is because we love their reaction.

Maybe it’s just me … but whenever I’ve sexted a guy I love knowing how crazy it’s driving them more than anything else. I love feeling in control of quickly changing their mood while I could be shopping for socks or hoovering my bedroom.

A lot of my friends get really funny about this kind of thing and to be fair I do understand why, for me a guy will only get the privilege of receiving sexts off of me once we’re officially together … and girls just and FYI when I say ‘sexts’ I do not mean naked pictures, if you want to send those as a bonus then thats down to you.

So if you find yourself wanting to send your guy something a bit naughty but are stuck for where to start, try one of my ideas from the list below and see how you get on!

  1. I’m so wet for you right now, I must really be craving your dick.
  2. I can’t stop thinking about having you deep inside me.
  3. I cant wait to rip your clothes off when I see you.
  4. I’m going to put your dick in my mouth as soon as I see you later.
  5. I’ll wait for you in bed, naked and ready to fuck.
  6. I want to feel you cum for me repeatedly tonight.
  7. I wish I could be making you cum in my mouth right now.
  8. I’m craving your tongue on my clit, its making me so wet thinking about you going down on me.
  9. I want you to fuck me so hard my you make my legs shake.
  10. Just so you know, I wont be wearing underwear later on our date.. so you have unlimited access to touch me whenever you want.