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It’s the two of you vs the problem

Let’s play out a scenario, a couple who are crazy about each other torn apart by the concept of “what if this goes wrong”.

To figure out if the relationship is worth fighting through this cloud of doubt for they decide to spend some time apart, both figuring out if they are willing to risk getting hurt.

But the irony is, you’ve now taken yourself away from the reminder of what you’re fighting for, you want to figure out if you can get past your “what if” problem and you’ve chosen that the best way to do it is by not being around them.

It feels like you’ve taken the problem and somehow let it come in the middle of the two of you. Now it’s turned into a you vs them situation, where the game is who can act like they’re less bothered and who can pretend to care less. As if the time apart isn’t phasing either of you.

How it should have been, is the two of you vs the problem. There’s an issue in your relationship, well you know how people typically get over that? By facing it head on together and supporting each other through times of uncertainty. That’s how problems get sorted, not by ignoring them and creating more distance.

The one proven way to make any relationship stronger, is by getting through the hard parts together as a solid unit. Not by pushing each other away and hoping that an empty space will solve everything for you.

Relationships take work, so take that issue the two of you have and use it to make you stronger together, by twisting it into a the two of you vs the problem situation.

As much as some people may disagree, space and distance do not help two people overcome a relationship problem. An issue in a relationship should be handled by the two of you together and if it turns out that the problem can’t be fixed, at least you can say you’ve tried.

Giving up and pretending like you don’t care is the biggest relationship failure, give the two of you some credit. Risk the make or break scenario.

Looking back at something and thinking you could have tried harder is the biggest punch in the face kind of feeling you could ever have.

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